Just Added Deep Thought By Finally:

My friend Steve told me to shoot him if he ever started dating a girl he met in a bar again. I hope he meant to include sushi bars.


Recent Deep Thoughts By Finally:

Playing around with double entendres can be loads of fun, especially if you get the double entendre naked and pound it like a cheap whore.

I like to think I am a good neighbor. I am always keeping an eye out for trouble. None of the neighbor kids ever come to our house for Halloween though. I know they go to the other houses because I watch them through the scope of my rifle.

I think women who do not want men staring at their chest should run around topless. This will discourage men from admiring their blouses.

I always pick up hitchikers when I see them on the road. I then drug them, tie them up, and throw them in my trunk. I drive around for a few hours then I let them go. I do this to teach them the dangers of hitchiking. Not one of them has ever thanked me.

If you hate going to the dentist you should eat lots of onions and garlic right before your appointment. Brushing your teeth and having nice breath just encourages him to spend more time in there.

I think fat people who wear spandex should have their eyes taped open and forced to look at even fatter people wearing spandex. I am not sure what to do about the even fatter people, I will get back to you on that.

They say if you encounter a dog that is vicious and growling to avoid looking into its eyes because it is a sign of aggression but you just try getting a blindfold on it.

-------------------------- --------------------------- ----
Old Boring Deep Thoughts By Finally:

I once drowned a man to watch him bleed. There was no blood but this is why you do these tests.

Taking candy from a baby is not as easy as everyone thinks. They cry and attract lots of attention as soon as you try. I suggest using chloroform.

They say ignorance is bliss but if you call an ignorant person stupid they get mad or cry. Maybe someone should tell them the definition of bliss.

I think if someone says they like you and want to be your friend you should poke them in the eye. That way you will see if this new friendship can stand up to adversity.

Sometimes I look out myself in the mirror and think that I look different somehow, I then verbally assault myself screaming of all the things I might do to me if I was not who I said I was, then I ask myself a question only I would know the answer. Sometimes all of that turns out very badly as I have a very short memory.

Things sure have changed, why when I was a kid you could be considered a freak just by smelling bad and shooting guns wildly in the air, nowadays if you aren't naked in the back yard covered in pigs blood no one takes you seriously.

A friend once told me that if I could not make a woman scream in bed I was doing something wrong. So now I break into different women's apartments and stand over their bed with a large knife.

Life can be so frustrating sometimes. I hate it when I buy something and the store and it is sealed in a plastic wrapping that requires a large knife to open. This really annoys me because I like instant gratification. I think about running over the person responsible for the packaging with my car, problem is I want them to be right in front of me when I want to do it, because I like instant gratification.

If you are going really fast on a highway and you have a blow out in one of your front tires you will probably spin around several times. This will be a surreal moment that seems like it takes a long time. I suggest contemplating the differences between jams, jellies, marmalades, and spreads to pass the time.

If you have a fly buzzing around you should wait until it is flying really fast and shut the lights off. It will probably run into something and knock itself out.

I find it is better to use water to give your pants that freshly peed in look. People will recoil just as fast when you try and hug them and you don't go through as much laundry detergent.

I don't think a person should act shocked if they tell me that life isn't fair and then I steal their wallet.

They say that if you come across a bear in the wild to remember that it is probably just as scared of you as you are of it. I think it is as likely if the bear runs off it just thinks you are ugly.

In an effort to maximize the amount of good luck I could get I decided to hire 200 people to continuously shout good luck at me all day. I don't think it worked because I hate noisy crowds.

If you suddenly got super powers and you could fly you might not want to fly very high because you might lose those powers just as suddenly.

-------------------------- --------------------------- ------

Welcome to my WALL OF SHAME: (re-formatted to be compliant with new restrictions)

Thread Section:

Theyhateme decides we should fire Van Gorder because we gave up 454 yards in our first pre-season game

FalconsFanSince1970 announces that his favorite posts of the year are his own

Adema1226 Decides that we will have a losing season no matter what.

Quote Section:

Latest entry. Here we have a troll actually confess that he has no desire to have good football discussions on our message board:

Ryan's Steakhouse 1.0 on 23 October 2009 - 10:56 PM

Perhaps it's because I have friends, real human friends, and I talk football with them. That I don't have the need to have a 'good football discussion' with a faceless message board poster.


The True #7 on Aug 28 2009, 12:39 PM

Watch yourself... Or not... You seem to be one of those dorky types that talks a big game, but when confronted, crawls away slowly after being pummelled for having a mouth that writes checks your a$$ can't cash... So, if you have the balls to back up your attitude, PM me an address... Otherwise, STFU!

SnowFalcon on Aug 24 2009, 11:43 AM

Home/Away is the most overrated aspect in football. So you're playing in your stadium, big deal. The only difference is the surface and the paint, a team that pins it's hopes on its crowd is destined for failure. If you're a grown man and people scream at you when you're on offense or cheer when the other team makes a big play of your defense and you get rattled you need to find another occupation.

peter griffin on Apr 30 2009, 07:12 PM

i'm a little worried about the throw back uni's

those olden day face masks have so much open space back that it will make it easier for the opponent to poke our guys in the eye's. i'm just glad our organization is not old enough to have throw back uniforms with the leather helmets. they did'nt even have a face mask, you know they would get poked in the eye's with those helmets. whats more, i have to believe that the pads from back then are far inferior to that of todays time. the throw backs will be neat to see, but at what cost? http://life.atlantafalcons. com/public/style_emoticons/ default/unsure.gif

sabzi-eater on Mar 30 2009, 11:10 AM

Maybe it's his [Matt Ryan's] bro. Throwing up every night to cope with his little brother being so much more of a stud than he is.

tonegully on Mar 26 2009, 12:04 AM

OK, so stop saying Ryan this and Ryan that until he wins in the playoffs. I dont care what he did last year. I want to see what he does this year and does the team improve.

Holiday Styles 80 on Mar 2 2009, 07:35 PM

Season Tickets baby!! I want to be there for the a** kicking thats going to be let loose on us.

flyfalconfan on Jan 12 2009, 06:08 PM

IMHO 3-4 defense is better than 4-3 teams that have used it make it to the superbowl.Remember wade philips was here when we made it to the superbowl using a 3-4 defense an a great running back in Jamal Anderson

mattyfalconice on Feb 18 2009, 12:44 PM

That if we beat Denver and Carolina loses Week 17 we win the division. Just post your honest factual knowledge no opinion necessary because it was on just about every sports station on TV and also its basic knowledge if we tie one tiebreaker then tie the other and win the next WE WIN dumbazzes. Please tell these children so they can stop posting irrational bullshyt on people's posts and they finally will look like idiots.

vickisbackthetriplecrown on Feb 24 2009, 02:07 PM

i am an author!!! with a masters degree you psycho!!!! !! i get paid, a lot of money, by the way, to analyze football. i also get paid, a lot of money, probably what you people make in a year if your lucky, to write, because of my education.

i am from boston, literally the most educated region of this country, and probably even the world!!!!

i barely ever have mistakes in my post, despite not even giving a **** what i misspell, or have wrong.